If you turned into the first night of the CW’s Labyrinth ready to begin a spectacular four hour reboot of the 1986 David Bowie fantasy film of the same name, then you might have been just as confused as I was when this title card came up.
There was a legit record scratch in my living room when this shit popped up, but there’s no such thing as a punch I can’t roll with and what better way for CW to appease jonesing Reign fans like myself then slip-slapping a period drama into the Thursday time slot the week after Reign’s finale? Don’t make me live in the present. This Labyrinth may have substantially fewer Goblin Kings with nut-hugging leggings turning the world upside down for 15-year-old girls, but it does have THIS guy:
Considering Labyrinth was filmed in 2012, I’m tempted to say the recent turn of Sebastian Stan in Captain America: Has Heavy Romantic Subtext With the Winter Soldier had everything to do with this airing now. Which hey, savvy! Sebastian Stan is as talented as he is handsome.
Labyrinth is also based on the novel by Kate Mosse (note the last “e”) with this snazzy cover:
I guessed this before I knew it because frankly Labyrinth feels very much like watching a novel. There’s the wish-fulfillment proxy, spritely blonde Brit Alice Turner, who’s been hooked up with an archaeological digging gig by her archaeologist friend (wish #1) days away from inheriting a beautiful house in Carcassone (wish #2) and then stumbles on a pair of embracing skeletons and a series of twinkly trinkets (wish #3 the trinkets, I mean) during the dig that give her visions of mysterious medieval woman Alais and ultimately compels her to cross paths with Sebastian Stan while he lays out in his pool (wish #4).
Alais is Alice’s way-back olden-times ancestor, and Alais really slayed the game when it came to being a virtuous 13th century daughter. She was up at the crack of dawn to apprentice with an herbalist, and then she’d go clean the rotting bodies out of the river etc.etc. Because of her non-stop 24-hour, 365-days a week lifestyle of 100% righteousness, her dad entrusted her with a batshit crazy secret. You ready for this? You’re not but here it is anyway:
Read the original here:
Labyrinth Connects the Holy Grail to Sebastian Stan's Abs, Illuminati